View Full Version : Olympics and Drugs
2004-08-24, 03:24 AM
I think there should be two totally separate Olympic games. One for honest people who don't take drugs/steroids, etc. and one for people who want to take as many drugs as they want. Need a line of blow before you run that 100 meters? Go for it. Want to pump yourself up with enough steroids to turn yourself in to a rhinoceros? Have at it. Think about how much fun THOSE games would be to watch.
2004-09-28, 04:02 PM
Didn't Saturday Night Live do a skit about that way back when. They showed Olympic weightlifting and the guy rips his arms out of their sockets trying to lift some insane weight.
I saw a news programme last night and it said, based on the results of a questionnaire, that 52% of athletes would take gene-enhancing drugs to win a gold medal even if they knew that they were going to die in 5 years time.
2004-09-29, 01:50 PM
I think there should be two totally separate Olympic games. One for honest people who don't take drugs/steroids, etc. and one for people who want to take as many drugs as they want.
Andy: The only athletes whose honesty we caould be sure of would be those who declared themselves unelegible to take part in the 'Olympics of Innocence'. At Olympic level there is no line that can be drawn. This year's legal training method (vitamin supplement, blood transfusion, legitimate medical treatment, recovery aid) is next years banned action. And so was it ever. The first Marathon runner probably refreshed himself with some roadside plant known for its 'restorative' properties.
Much as I admire innocence in many respects (but more of that, ahem, elsewhere), I think that a little more healthy cynicism might be called for here.
peace love and understanding
2004-09-29, 03:10 PM
Those were the good old days of SNL, with Phil Hartman playing the East German weightlifter.
I agree with Sheep on the rest of it. Athletes are going to push their bodies to the limits to break records and grab the gold. Even with all-natural bodybuilding competitions, the bodybuilders take all the legal supplements they can get their hands on and if theres a chance they can take steroids that are out of their system by competition time, they'll do it.
The only way to create a completely level playing field is to have an unbiased physician/dietician with the athlete every day, one year prior to the competition. Taking blood samples and approving or disapproving whatever the athlete put into his body. However, it would be fun to watch a Dope Olympics where every competitor was juiced to the max. Seeing mass monsters having heart attacks on the track and what not.
2004-09-29, 03:36 PM
How about... instead of an onlympics where athletes use all sorts of drugs to prepare, just create a drug olympics, with beautiful events such as:
-Who can smoke the most joints in an hour.
-Fastest heroine prep/injection time.
-Pothead snack abstinance (how long they can go without touching the bowl of doritos in front of them while stoned?
-Acid artist (very subjective, but so is 'ice dancing')
And I'm sure there are many more.
2004-09-29, 05:00 PM
-the crack and meth binge (who can stay awake the longest without OD'ing)
-most joints competition would have to be modified to who can jack up the THC levels in their bloodstream the highest. This is because you can smoke faster without inhaling.
-forgotten week competition (who can keep their average BAC the highest over a 1 week period)
-Smoke rings (subjective, like the acid artist competition)
Please, people we need more ideas.
2004-09-29, 05:30 PM
How about the fastest or hardest erection event?
I remember I once met a funky J-girl who loved trippin' out on mushrooms. I hadn't shroomed since university and wasn't sure I wanted to start doing it again in Tokyo until she confessed to getting very horny whenever she was high.
It started out as a very good trip. Drinking, laughing (a lot), and kissing in a bar that played 60's music. But I'm here to tell you that heightened conciousness is a sword that cuts both ways...
Back at my place and she's spread-eagled on my bed. I'm standing above her with my ____ bouncing off my belly button. I swear to the Gods that I could have fought off Achilles with my throbber, that's how hard it was...
Unfortunately, 2 or 3 minutes into the bump & grind, I looked at her face and saw a reptilian monster. I jumped off her in horror. Had to ride out 2 hours of demons and paranoia.
For all that, I kinda wish it was still legal.
2004-10-15, 01:59 PM
-who can do the most catamine and then walk 10 ft.....I would like to see that one!
-non-talking extasy circle( have everyone take some pills then see who talks first=loser last person to talk gets the gold)
-biggest $hit after doing coke(i don't know maybe it's just me but when I used to do it I always had to take a big $hit)
just some ideas................
The poor Canadian snowboarder, in the 1998 Olympics, they took away his medal because he tested positive for marijuana, which is kinda redundant number one, number two, they said that marijuana was a 'performance-enhancing drug.' EEEEHHH.
Marijuana enhances many things, colors, shapes, sensations, but you are certainly not ____ing empowered. When you're stoned, you're lucky if you can find your own goddamn feet! The only way it's a performance-enhancing drug is if there's a big ____ing hershey bar at the end of the run.
chocolate medals hehe