A difficult question

[encephalon]

"Ahem"

Sorry if this question is a little raunchy.

My current girlfriend and I have a little bit of a "physical incompatability". Basically, she is a little bit "too small", which makes things more than a little difficult when it comes to the bedroom.

Does anyone have any suggestions about how to deal with problems like this??

Thanks in advance.

[trip_hop]

As a baby can potentially negotiate its exit via that route, size is not really an issue.

Reasons for "tightness": lack of preparation (foreplay), inability to relax, lack of lubrication, previous physical trauma and lesions, etc.. It may be the first two that are the issue here.

So.....spend more time with her, improve the foreplay, use internal digital stimulation to relax and expand the vaginal tract, use lots of lubricant - even as part of your foreplay, and encourage her to take more control of you, i.e. pull you in as opposed to you pushing. Sometimes pain can cause reflex constriction, which causes in turn more pain, a vicious circle.

Be patient with her, but if it does persist, a physical check would not hurt, just to eliminate any physicial trauma.

[madmaxxam]

My new advice for all situations: DUMP HER!!! Get a looser chick!

Seriously though, I'd have to agree with Trip_hop. Most likely it's not a problem of physical incompatibility, but a 'bad approach' that's causing the problems. Plenty of well hung gaijin have been having sex with tons of 'tight' Japanese girls.

And too raunchy? You obviously haven't read enough threads here.

[Morning Star]

Make her "bigger." Or try finding a girlfriend over the age of 13.

Anyway, nice to know you found a girlfriend

[encephalon]

Thanks for the advice.

Believe me, foreplay isn't the problem... The foreplay has tended to go into the "hours" range(and I do all the friggin' work, too... but that's a different issue...) Maybe she couldn't relax, I don't know.... But I'll try the lubricant thing for sure, thanks...

As for letting her take control, I've tried to convince her, but she doesn't exactly have much initiative... it really isn't in her personality, I think... Of course, some people might just call it "maguro", I guess...

The thing is it is more than just being "tight", she said it hurts. She says it doesn't hurt a lot, but she was walking kinda funny afterwards. She says it's allright, but I can tell it really isn't.

Thanks for your reply...


P.S. On the topic of "internal digital stimulation"
But are these digital bits good enough for her naughty bits?? "10111010101010"
=)

[madmaxxam]

But are these digital bits good enough for her naughty bits?? "10111010101010"
=)

Well, I find that the 1's are easy enough... but my girl usually complains when I try the 0's.

[Morning Star]

You should try, "1000101" instead. That way you don't have to worry about size.

Encephalon, are you scrambling her guts or is the girth of your member so impressive that it has a hard time fitting in? Luckily, I have the opposite problem, in both respects.

[madmaxxam]

Most guys just wanna be bigger, etc., and then someone comes along with a problem like this. Just goes to show that we guys don't really know what we want.

[Nozomi]

Encephalon, my friend!
Glad to hear you found yourself a girlfriend. Is it the girl from Osaka you met at the International Party in Shibuya by any chance? Or maybe, someone closer to Ibaraki? Anyway, share your secrets with us! We all want to know how you met.

のぞみ

[smallworld]

As a baby can potentially negotiate its exit via that route, size is not really an issue.
Not without incredible pain.
A _____ is supposed to feel good. Whether caused by a baby or extra-wide _____, having one's vagina stretched out tends to hurt.

Anyway, the baby comparison may make (a bit) of sense if you're talking about width, but considering a baby goes out out and a _____ goes in, it makes no sense if you're talking about length.

It's true. A too-long _____ hammering away at the cervix can really hurt. No amount of lubrication can help there.

That being said, it could also be that Encephalon is exaggerating his "physical incompatability". His problem probably has a lot to do with his technique and her attitude.
Or his girl could have a gynecological disorder. Plenty of possibilities, besides the physical trauma Trip Hop mentioned: endometriosis, a yeast or bacterial infection, an STD, the list goes on. None of these are uncommon, and since Japanese women don't tend to visit the gynocologist until they're pregnant, she might not even know if she has a problem.

Encephalon, you need to find out when it hurts- during penetration, deep thrusting, in certain positions? And where- on the walls of the vagina, near the opening? deep inside, near the cervix? to the back? to the front? everywhere?

Until you find out what's wrong, be gentle. Hours of foreplay shouldn't be necessary- quality counts over quantity.

[swordfishtrombone]

K-y Jelly.

[encephalon]

Thanks for your replies, everyone.

Morning Star, to answer your question, she said it is both.

madmaxxam, I was having exactly the same thought...

Nozomi, glad to answer your question. The girls from Osaka, though incredibly fun, are simply too busy... I figured I was being blown off at first, and then realized that we got along too well for that... a real pity... but we might get together again sometime just to have fun.

I turned 24 on September 25, so I went to Tokyo, went to Shinjuku and ended up in Shibuya with a couple of friends. We ended up at a pub maybe 45 minutes before closing time, the place was pretty empty. There were two women by themselves, and three of us. One of us went and invited them over, and we started to talk. The girl found out it was my birthday, asked me if I was seeing anyone(no), and said "I'll be your birthday present!" A happy birthday indeed. Turns out she's a real sweetheart, too =)

smallworld, I hear what you're saying. I haven't ever had this problem before, though, so I really don't think it's my "technique". Yes, I do need to get a more detailed description, for sure. "Hours of foreplay shouldn't be necessary" No $%&#. Believe me, that's not because of me... Gonna get friggin' carpal tunnel syndrome...

Again, thanks...

[kurogane]

encephalon,
It happens. Unless its true love, it will probably always be an issue. I, errr, a Very Good and Close Friend found that a few concerted efforts resulted in substantial improvement in the situation, but His GF wasn't very happy for a while, and she walked pretty funny for a couple of weeks. After that, everything was hunky dory. Adjustment seems to be required. AND YES, I know how that sounds. The question is, are both of you interested enough to try?

As for the having babies argument, I'm with smallworld. I have never heard a woman say that the actual labour event was anything other than very painful. Physical Luuv, on the other hand, is supposed to be pleasurable, if not down right mind blowing.

Anyhoo, You are not alone, my obscurely handled friend.

[Bluedog]

2 days ago bluedog had the experience of watching his new son do his exit manouver. Pretty tricky stuff. It's a bit like the Tardis from Dr Who. If I was a religious man, I'd be thinking that the exit port was just about the best invention on earth. Good for so many things.

[encephalon]

Thanks, Kurogane.

Adjustment, huh?

Yes, I think we're up to trying. I am, at least. It is the most "comfortable" relationship I've ever been in. Surprisingly, I think she is up to trying as well. Who knows, maybe deep down, she's a masochist or something... It wouldn't surprise me, given her reaction to this whole thing...

She said it hurt, but wasn't angry... she seemed, in some strange, subtle way that seemed very alien to me, to be kind of "satisfied"... but maybe that was just because she hadn't gotten any at all for a while, I don't know...

[encephalon]

Congrats, BlueDog.

Yes, but how ironic it is that the "exit" port is even good for entrances, too.

[madmaxxam]

Congrats, BlueDog.

Yes, but how ironic it is that the "exit" port is even good for entrances, too.

That's cause it's not just an exit port. We call it an I/O port. Personally, I'm hoping for just the I for at least a few more years. Kids are scary when you're 21.

Oh, and Congrats Bluedog.

[Mononoke_hime]

Gosh...someone's complaining that IT is too big? This is the first time I'm hearing this. Not wanting to sound too busy-body, but how big is exatcly too big? Are Japanese girls really "tighter" than white/black/cocoa girls? I've always thought that it is only a question of pelvic width and positioning? ie. having to carry only smaller babies, asian girls tend to have smaller pelvic zone, no? Being a muscular organ, the vagina should be able to strech I suppose, so I think like what most said, relaxation helps.

This brings us to another point, the perception of sex to most Japanese women. From what I understand, most asian girls still think that sex is another step of life one has to go through, and sex is more a chore or deed to accomplish to satisfy her husband, than a form of personal pleasure. Sort of, "my duty is to let my BF or husband satisfy his desire". This is really psycological and if the girl is unable to relax, I think she is experiencing a high amount of anxiousness. Furthermore, her obligation, yes her "obligation" to always please stops her from relaxing, then she panics and voila` a tight situation (pun is intended).

Sexual practice in Japan or in Asia should really take a new perspective. Sex is not dirty, sex is not for making babies exclusively, having casual sex is not a sin etc and sex is fun!

My Taiwanese friend got dumped by her French husband recently and I talked to her husband and he confided in me that is due to sexual problems. He just had enough of "having sex with a chopping board" experience, and that is after having 3 kids with her?!!!!

So, if there are japanese girls reading this : Being a slut for a few minutes a day won't hurt, and like what Peaches sang "F*** the pain away"!!!!!!

[liamoko]

Gosh...someone's complaining that IT is too big? This is the first time I'm hearing this. Not wanting to sound too busy-body, but how big is exatcly too big? Are Japanese girls really "tighter" than white/black/cocoa girls? I've always thought that it is only a question of pelvic width and positioning? ie. having to carry only smaller babies, asian girls tend to have smaller pelvic zone, no? Being a muscular organ, the vagina should be able to strech I suppose, so I think like what most said, relaxation helps.

This brings us to another point, the perception of sex to most Japanese women. From what I understand, most asian girls still think that sex is another step of life one has to go through, and sex is more a chore or deed to accomplish to satisfy her husband, than a form of personal pleasure. Sort of, "my duty is to let my BF or husband satisfy his desire". This is really psycological and if the girl is unable to relax, I think she is experiencing a high amount of anxiousness. Furthermore, her obligation, yes her "obligation" to always please stops her from relaxing, then she panics and voila` a tight situation (pun is intended).

Sexual practice in Japan or in Asia should really take a new perspective. Sex is not dirty, sex is not for making babies exclusively, having casual sex is not a sin etc and sex is fun!

My Taiwanese friend got dumped by her French husband recently and I talked to her husband and he confided in me that is due to sexual problems. He just had enough of "having sex with a chopping board" experience, and that is after having 3 kids with her?!!!!

So, if there are japanese girls reading this : Being a slut for a few minutes a day won't hurt, and like what Peaches sang "F*** the pain away"!!!!!!

your post just scares me dude....

[Mononoke_hime]

Scared you? How? Why?

I spoke the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help me TheForce!!!! I didn't know that there are underaged kids reading this forum :-)

[ShitagiDorobo]

mononoke, I think there are japanese girls who like sex a lot and are still just physically much smaller than your average white/black/cocoa/whatever girl. I know this to be true from personal experience. Also, sex is a sin, and that's what makes it fun.

I agree with kurogane about the "adjustment".

I actually know a small chinese girl who has tried several times to lose her virginity and failed because her boyfriend is physically too wide to fit inside of her. I tried giving her the same argument about babies having to come through there some day. Her reply was, "you're obviously not a girl..."

[Mononoke_hime]

mononoke, I think there are japanese girls who like sex a lot and are still just physically much smaller than your average white/black/cocoa/whatever girl. I know this to be true from personal experience. Also, sex is a sin, and that's what makes it fun.
Wow I like this quote! "Sex is sinful, and that's what makes it fun"!!!!! Great quote ShitagiDorobo.


I actually know a small chinese girl who has tried several times to lose her virginity and failed because her boyfriend is physically too wide to fit inside of her. I tried giving her the same argument about babies having to come through there some day. Her reply was, "you're obviously not a girl..."
I disagree that loosening is impossible, Impossible is not french (Napolean said that). She just have to try "harder". I mean if homosexual men can have sodomy with very well hung men (ie more than 23cm, dunno what is that in inches) I don't see why a vagina can't house something similar to that size. Am I being too crude? If I'm, sorry I will tone it down the next time. Perhaps we men really are not girls...and will never know what they mean. For me, biologically and logically speaking, if even the smallest baby can come out "there"....what goes out can always come back in with some effort I suppose?

[Boognish]

Mononoke_hime wrote:

So, if there are japanese girls reading this : Being a slut for a few minutes a day won't hurt, and like what Peaches sang "F*** the pain away"!!!!!!

Christ, I saw Peaches about 2 years ago in Austin when she was touring with Queens of the Stone Age. One of the funniest sights these eyes have gazed upon. Everyone in the audience was laughing their ___ off or booing. Everyone except the two Mexican chubby gay lovers right next to me, who kept screaming "PEACHIZZ" in a really ___gy voice during the entire show. The best part of her show was when she wore a big red strap-on and performed oral on herself, Peaches must do yoga or something. Luckily, Trail of Dead came in and rocked the house, followed by a kickass Queens set. PEACHES SUCKS.

[ShitagiDorobo]

I wasn't trying to say that I though loosening was impossible. In fact, I know it is possible from personal experience. The first japanese girl with whom I had sex was pretty small. The first time she said that while it was fairly painful, but still quite pleasurable. From the second time on, she said it no longer hurt, except perhaps a little bit right after we started.

I guess the problem with my friend was that it just literally couldn't even be forced in, so there was no way without some intermediate stretching. Maybe it's something best done gradually. Kind of like when people have piercings and they want to go up to the next size, they don't usually just more than a couple gauges at a time. However, I imagine a majority girls would have problems finding some random guy with the right size johnson just to help get them up to the next level. I've heard that back in the roman days, deflowering a girl was seen as unappetizing, and so many girls were broken in with some sort of phallic statue (although somehow different from a dildo, perhaps).

[kurogane]

Encephallis,

Yup. I agree that they are "satisfied", often in a strange way. I think it is because when it is real (i.e. when it's Luuv), They feel as though they have a Real Man. Japanese girls often expect their man to be just that, The Man. In my case, err, Mai Friendo's case, we just went slowly, but progressively, and after a few weeks of, err, adjustment, things were fine. She still complains that I "stretched her out", but she always has a weird grin on her face when she says it.
If it feels real, then it is probably worth the effort on both parts. Just go slowly, and keep it as lighthearted as you can. And those two words, K=Y Jelly. Very important.

[Welesley]

The only other suggestion I would have is let her come first. That would cover the relaxation aspect.

Or change the venue. That has a huge effect on some women.

[madmaxxam]

This brings us to another point, the perception of sex to most Japanese women. From what I understand, most asian girls still think that sex is another step of life one has to go through, and sex is more a chore or deed to accomplish to satisfy her husband, than a form of personal pleasure. Sort of, "my duty is to let my BF or husband satisfy his desire". This is really psycological and if the girl is unable to relax, I think she is experiencing a high amount of anxiousness.

Not what I've seen at all with my Japanese GF. Maybe this is true for some of the 'old guard', but I think most young Japanese people see sex as fun.

[encephalon]

Again, thanks to everyone for your comments.

I've talked to a friend of mine who's had similiar problems, and is quite well versed (via his Man-Whore Years) in these types of matters, and he had a couple pieces of advice.

Length: Get her on top, and let her control the motion. And don't ever ever try doggie or legs-over shoulders without knowing for sure that she's ready for it.

Width: It's not so big of an issue after the 3rd orgasm.

[Gaijin de Moscu]

Again, thanks to everyone for your comments.

I've talked to a friend of mine who's had similiar problems, and is quite well versed (via his Man-Whore Years) in these types of matters, and he had a couple pieces of advice.

Length: Get her on top, and let her control the motion. And don't ever ever try doggie or legs-over shoulders without knowing for sure that she's ready for it.

Width: It's not so big of an issue after the 3rd orgasm.

Wise advise your friend gave you.

As to me, I don't even start getting in before she'd had one or two orgasms. Learnt my lessons from all the previous relations and pains :) Even then I feel a bit tight; but would anyone mind that? :)

For some guys who mentioned that a Japanese lady may look at sex as a duty... I heard it before; and I was afraid of it. My current g/f admitted that she'd been rather *concervative* before she met me. When we were just starting, she said she would be comfortable if we had sex... once a month, like she had with her ex husband.

But now... she's on fire. We are indulging twice a day and she wants more - and in very unexpected places. I am in heaven on earth. I bless the day when I came to Japan, and I love her and I can not have enough of her.

[madmaxxam]

Hers or mine?

If you're reaching your third orgasm before hers you need some lesson in love making.

[beaner]

encephalon, how about just 'playing' together with various-sized 'toys' for a while? Don't even attempt anything else for a while. Focus on 'playing' and through this you will gradually find out what she likes. And she will gain confidence. It takes a while, sometimes for a girl to gain confidence in her own body. Try a really romantic setting,too...maybe a nice warm, relaxing bath together,by candlelight...you don't even have to have sex,sometimes. For a woman,sometimes it's not always the 'goal' of every evening. Just being 'close' is maybe more important to her right now...be patient.

[madmaxxam]

Whoah! Whoah! He-LLO??? Don't even have to have sex?...ARE YOU NUTS?? What kind of advice are you giving the poor guy!? Going on about "goals for women"!! encephalon, dude, don't fall for this stuff!

I'm really hoping all these 'insecure guy' posts of yours are just an act.

[madmaxxam]

LOL

An act it was, but I wasn't going for 'insecure guy' - I guess that means no Tony?

More chauvinist than anything else, but usually chauvanists are insecure, so I just made the leap... And not everyone can get a Tony.

[beaner]

akahebi, ---I said- '...you don't even have to have sex, SOMETIMES...' ---can you read? I knew this would attract some immature,self-centered,unconstructive glib comments. I'm trying to help 'encephalon' by thinking of how his girl maybe feeling right now. It was just a suggestion.

[encephalon]

Thanks, everyone.

Well, I have to say, it has gotten a little better... but another problem I thought would go away on its own has not...

Simply put, she doesn't seem interested in reciprocating anything in bed... I'm doing all the work, and she's getting most of the benefit.

She also has some psychological thing where she always has to be under the covers (and have clothes on) during much of anything, which makes my job harder...

Anyway, it has gotten to the point of ticking me off...

Any insights on this, anyone... I'm willing to work through the other problem, but her un-reciprocal(read: selfish) nature in the bedroom is starting to irritate me...

[madmaxxam]

Simply put, she doesn't seem interested in reciprocating anything in bed... I'm doing all the work, and she's getting most of the benefit.

She also has some psychological thing where she always has to be under the covers (and have clothes on) during much of anything, which makes my job harder...

Anyway, it has gotten to the point of ticking me off...

Any insights on this, anyone... I'm willing to work through the other problem, but her un-reciprocal(read: selfish) nature in the bedroom is starting to irritate me...

Hmmmm... never really had this problem myself, although many guys do. As for clothes, with both my current and my ex, it was pretty much nekkid time after showering, and hell, with my current girlfriend we don't always make it to the bed (mostly because it's sort of lofted).

How long have you been going out with her? If it's been at least a month or so, tell her that you're getting bored of the standard position, and want to try 'horse style'. I never heard 'woman on top' referred as that until Japan. Getting her on top might help teach her the joys of doing some of the work.

Also, clothes + covers: Many women, Japanese and non, can be embarrased by their body. Try letting her know how beautiful you think you are when it comes time to pillowing, and that you want to see more of her body. Maki at first was a bit self-conscious, but I pretty much eliminated that within a week.

[Gaijin de Moscu]

Good advice Madmaxxam!

To add something on the very valid points raised by Encephalon...

1. Clothes / hiding of the body. I never had this problem in a serious way but she was indeed a bit shy at first (as was I). She used to sleep in pygamas, for example. So I voiced what I really felt - that I loved how her body looks - she is very fit, with slim waste and impeccable breasts - over and over; and we established that we love the touch of the skin... and I said that I want to look at her everywhere when we are making love, especially there... and there... and also there...

So anyway, we are making love with good light, in full nudity, and - both of us - with our eyes open for a good deal of the time. And she understands that I am a visual person, and she admits she is, too, so life is great... no one sleeps in pygamas any more :)

2. Number of positions.

We once were chatting with a mutual american friend of ours, who is an ero-jiji... so he asked:

'How many positions do you guys do?'

'Sixteen,' I say immediately.

Eeee? I can see in her eyes, but she, being a good lady, says nothing and just nods.

'Sixteen?' asks my ero-jiji friend.

'Sixteen,' I say confidently.

When he's gone, she challenges me to demonstrate, and she's deadly serious... even though of course both of us are laughing. I engage my full creativity, and we try them all out. Some of those she immediately disqualifies, and I come up with more ideas. In a while, both of us happy, we settle on 16 acceptable positions.

Next evening, I look at her and say: 'Now it's your turn. Show me your 16!'

She laughs, and goes for it...

So now it's an inner joke between us - 'the 16' whenever we feel like we need novelty.

3. Novelty. As my previous relations were sex-boring, this time I decided to enjoy it to the fullest from the start. And she was very responsive. So we played strip poker, other adult games, drank champaign and ate strawberries from each other... with cream.... we found erotic massage qualities of skinned grapes, the value of seduction in an arm chair and erotic qualities of soft chocolate cakes; and of course of the Thai massage oil...

So... just a couple of my 'insights'. Last insight - we are seriously in love.

[Morning Star]

Good Moscu, finally letting us sink our teeth into your bedroom behaviors.

As for under the covers with clothes on... ("Do you mind if I just stick my _____ through this hole in my pajamas?") A good way to break her of that is to get a leash with a furry collar and take her for a naked walk around the apartment building.

You've got to set the rules early on, otherwise you'll get trapped and she'll think you're playing games with her or you're getting bored with her when you try to change things. Talk to her while you're plowing away, tell her to turn around... flip it upside down, get on her knees, bark like a dog. Whatever, she'll do it because it's either that or you kick her out of the apartment.

[kurogane]

MS,
Stop being so sensitive and caring. You're making me feel like a women-hater
:p

Moscuva,
Nice. There is nothing like pulling the chain of the ero-jiis, eh? They can be so easy to tease, it seems almost cruel, but a lot of them deserve the occasional tease, just for being dirt-dogs. After all, thats what friends are for, eh?
But Seriously man, Sixteen??? That is truly a magic number.

Encephalon,
It sounds like its time to have a talk. Is there a bit of a language problem? Anyways, tell her you feel like you are not getting enough reciprocation. It may also be a matter of time. It took a fair while (compared to Candian GFs) for the girl I was writing about above to become freer in bed (as in two years). For what it's worth, it was well worth the wait. Frustrating, to be sure, but worth it. Years later, when I asked her why she took so bloddy long, she said straight out: "What? Do you think I wanted you to think I'm a slut?"

[encephalon]

Thanks again...

There's no language problem; just a communication problem. I feel like I have to twist her arm(basically I repeat "I'm doing all the work here. You need to do something for me, too" in various ways about a billion times) to get her to have intercourse at all. I've tried to talk about it, but she doesn't say much. She just seems to want me to walk the fingers and such, and that's it. Maybe I wouldn't need actual intercourse; a blow-job or two would do, but she's even less willing to do that.

I've tried to talk with her about it to no avail. It's just that that attitude is irritating. She's out of town for a couple of weeks, so I'm taking this opportunity to reconsider this relationship. If it looks like it won't get any better, I'm going to try and make a run for it before it gets really messy (since I think the girl is getting more serious, despite our[OK, *my*] "problems" in it).

[madmaxxam]

Thanks again...

There's no language problem; just a communication problem. I feel like I have to twist her arm(basically I repeat "I'm doing all the work here. You need to do something for me, too" in various ways about a billion times) to get her to have intercourse at all. I've tried to talk about it, but she doesn't say much. She just seems to want me to walk the fingers and such, and that's it. Maybe I wouldn't need actual intercourse; a blow-job or two would do, but she's even less willing to do that.

I've tried to talk with her about it to no avail. It's just that that attitude is irritating. She's out of town for a couple of weeks, so I'm taking this opportunity to reconsider this relationship. If it looks like it won't get any better, I'm going to try and make a run for it before it gets really messy (since I think the girl is getting more serious, despite our[OK, *my*] "problems" in it).

From what you've said in these past two paragraphs, I have only 1 thing to say: Get out, now. Even if sex isn't the most important thing in a relationship (I'm not saying it is or isn't), it's definately up there. If this is already such a huge issue, think of down the road. You don't ever want a girl that requires you to work for sex from the get go.

[Gaijin de Moscu]

I tend to agree with Madmaxxam. From my rich experience in failed relations, it's better to cut a failing one early.

I know many people would fight on, and probably rightly so; but I would 'cut the losses' and move on.

[Morning Star]

encephalitis;

Isn't this the same chick that you took home as a birthday present? Maybe she meant it literally and didn't intend to be the gift that keeps on giving year-round.

"Happy f@cking birthday!"

[Morning Star]

And 1 more thing if you decide to stay in this relationship.

If you need advice on twisting the girls arm and forcing her to have sex with you, Madmaxxam may be able to give you some pointers.

[akahebi]

I feel like I have to twist her arm

Funny. I've found that breaking arms has always been a big turn on for my partners.

Have you tried the jealously strategy? Let her catch you in bed with someone else? Tell her, "See?? *THIS* is how you do it!"

[kurogane]

Funny. I've found that breaking arms has always been a big turn on for my partners.

Have you tried the jealously strategy? Let her catch you in bed with someone else? Tell her, "See?? *THIS* is how you do it!"
You make me laugh. You are the New Bad Boy around here. I pass the crown.
:)

[encephalon]

Once again, thanks for all your comments.

I've made the decision to end it. I've come to the conclusion that the sooner the better. At most, I think I might see her one more time to make sure it's what I want to do.

I'm supposed to meet a (different) woman on Saturday. Simple equation, I think. If it seems to go well, it will just cement the end Birthday Girl.

[mcalpine]

Sorry if I mispelled your screename.

I wanted to add a few comments about your last couple of threads but before that I would like to give a shout out to Madmaxxx and Kurogane for keeping this thread going. don't worry about what ladies think when they reply to you with harsh words and useless rhetoric; forget them.

Back to Encephelon:

I too am involved in relationship where my partner is non-responsive to my sexual needs.
I can go on and on about what she doesn't do in bed, but I won't do that.

The best advice is to keep her and get another girlfriend. Try and not show any desire when you are in the bedroom; cuddle her, kiss her. And eventually as you do this she will begin to open up. Make sex the last priority with her and instead focus on the intimate aspects of it.

Get another girl in the mean time...