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  • shy j-guy

    I met a nice guy through a friend of a friend a couple of months ago. He is Japanese, and although neither of us are particularly strong in the other's language, we get along well and have similar interests etc. Last month, he even told my friend that he thinks I am attractive but is a bit shy to talk to me because of language issues... Anyway, we have met about 5-8 times, always with other people, and communicate mostly through e-mail. (We communicate in writing and in person in a mix of Japanese and English.)
    Here's the thing - if I was back at home and thought the guy was just shy, I would have made a move on him by now. But with this guy, even though I think he likes me, I hesitate to make a move because I don't know how to read his signals.
    How can I find out if he is romantically interested in me?
    And how can I let him know that I am interested in him romantically without scaring him?


  • #2
    Re: shy j-guy

    POKE HIM GENTLY WITH A LONG STICK BUT MAKE SURE IT'S A BLUNT STICK.

    EDITED TO SAY "POKE HIM GENTLY WITH A LONG BLUNT STICK".

    If he cawwws, he loves you. If he doesn't... it was never meant to be.



    Post Edited (10-14-03 09:14)

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    • #3
      Re: shy j-guy

      kent, how long and how blunt? might you be suggesting that i poke him with an object known as a "dildo"? don't you reckon that the "take charge" approach might just be a bit too, ummm, forward, to this breed known as the shy j-guy?
      in any case, i appreciate your bluntness (no pun intended)... upon re-reading my post in a slightly more lucid state, i see that my questions were rather adolescent. shall cease and desist henceforth.

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      • #4
        Re: shy j-guy

        x,
        Don't worry. I think you have the same problem every gaijin girl has in Japan. I know its hard with Japanese, because there is a cultural difference, but I think Love is the same in all cultures, and so if you want a relationship with this guy, just tell him! If it scares him and he runs away, maybe its not meant to be and hes not good for you anyway. Japanese men can be difficult....oh wait, thats all men.....

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: shy j-guy

          I too could never tell if the glances in my direction were a sign of interest or simple lets-stare-at-the-gaijin curiosity. I also think that many Japanese people are good at pretending to be shy, when really they just don't want to embarass themselves so they don't say or do anything. And then of course, there's trying to tell if he is really interested in you, or just wants to have sex with a foreign girl to see what it's like...or just that he's a guy and will have sex if the opportunity arises!

          If anyone can shed any light on this, I'd be happy to take some notes.

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          • #6
            Re: shy j-guy

            miyagi-san, where are you?

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: shy j-guy

              One word :

              うらやましい〜  ^^

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: shy j-guy

                My solution to this problem is to take the guy out, get a couple of tequila shots in him, then grab his ass. If he squeals, then he doesn't like you. If he grabs yours back, he's a keeper! Believe me, this ALWAYS works!

                (what, she's kidding, right? right? NO?? who IS this girl??)

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                • #9
                  Re: shy j-guy

                  jguylover, thanks for the tip on how to be charmingly subtle, but someone else done beat ya to the punch... substitute the grabbing with the poking and the squealing with the cawing and whattaya got? a classic KB response minus the humour! so now who's kidding who? btw, how many keepers ya got going there?

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                  • #10
                    Re: shy j-guy

                    Just stay close meeting as often as possible.
                    He will make his own move... without you having to embarass him.

                    jloverguy is a playgirl: do not do as she says/does,,, but the alchohol is probably a good idea tho

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: shy j-guy

                      To add, I`d kinda agree on the alcohol bit too.
                      People in general gets a lot more talkative once they have some ethanol in them
                      The Japanese especially (in contrast). I mean, some people can`t get any more talkative when tipsy compared to when they are sober.

                      (Waiting for jloverguy`s invite to go drinking...)

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                      • #12
                        Re: shy j-guy

                        you betcha alcohol works!

                        by the way, define "playgirl" - you say that as if it's a BAD thing! (^^)
                        With my technique, at least I weed out the boys from the men.

                        If you wanna hear a really funny story, the way I met my current guy was by licking his nipples when he was dancing with his shirt off. (^^) He's one of the coolest & cutest guys I've ever dated!

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                        • #13
                          Re: shy j-guy

                          More women need to think and act like jguylover!!

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                          • #14
                            Re: shy j-guy

                            Dancing with his shirt off?
                            Geez, musta have pretty good bod.. (and definitely not shy!)

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: shy j-guy

                              i vote for alchool too ^_^
                              yellow will turn to red and he will be less shy...
                              It's a way...

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