How do you meet women in Japan?

[Mav]

I have often heard that it's easy to meet girls in Japan, but how you all go about it? Apparently, a lot of guys use the 'I"ll teach you English if you teach me Japanese' strategy or go to Gaijin bars to meet up with the local Gaijin Hunter population. Is this really the case? How do you go about meeting girls who aren't all about English practice?

[kurosawa]

It's a good question, I want to know as well. I see 2 japanese girls on the bus in London last night, I attempted to talk to one and got hardcore ignored, like I was invisible. haha maybe they are used to London boys trying their luck. I've met 4 Japanese girls since I started a retail job in London, that's only because we are in an enviroment where we need to talk to eachother (they were customers)

[the_pink_tako_yaki]

just remember that if you go to gaijin bars, at most of them there are wayyyy more gaijin guys than japanese girls, and most of the gaijin guys have the same exact idea that you just posted, so you might have to start calling dibs or something.

[Pkl]

Originally Posted by the_pink_tako_yaki

just remember that if you go to gaijin bars, at most of them there are wayyyy more gaijin guys than japanese girls, and most of the gaijin guys have the same exact idea that you just posted, so you might have to start calling dibs or something.

Though it's worth mentioning that a lot of the guys are quite old, overweight and badly dressed. Or just complete twats.

Manage to avoid those pitfalls (though age is excusable by itself) and you're in with a fighting chance.

To answer the opening question directly:

Exactly the same kind of places where you meet women back home.

[Showa45]

Originally Posted by kurosawa

It's a good question, I want to know as well. I see 2 japanese girls on the bus in London last night, I attempted to talk to one and got hardcore ignored, like I was invisible. haha maybe they are used to London boys trying their luck. I've met 4 Japanese girls since I started a retail job in London, that's only because we are in an enviroment where we need to talk to eachother (they were customers)

I have a girlfriend in London. She's Japanese and beautiful. She emails me all the time about being hit on or approached. She says that it happens so much that it makes her dislike men all together. Anyway, the easiest place for you to do it is obviously via your job. Their defenses are down so if you're a nice and well groomed guy it should be quite easy.

Originally Posted by kurosawa

It's a good question, I want to know as well. I see 2 japanese girls on the bus in London last night, I attempted to talk to one and got hardcore ignored, like I was invisible. haha maybe they are used to London boys trying their luck. I've met 4 Japanese girls since I started a retail job in London, that's only because we are in an enviroment where we need to talk to eachother (they were customers)

And I wonder how long youd last if you started hitting on girsl who just came in to buy a pair of jeans.

Imagine how youd feel if you are in japan and you get hit on every 10 minutes by every plain Jane girl who decides they like you while spotting you walking down the street Im sure the girls in London get pretty sick of the attention and wolf whistles.

I read in JT here that many women actually hook with lovers and boyfriends at the gym while they are working out. Exercises is a big thing for many of these women. Join a sports club and then start lifting weights or use the pool.

My advice probably is getting involved in club activities and meet people in the process of doing things, than prowling around gaijin bars looking for a score that is not there.

[kurosawa]

Originally Posted by Flying_Dutchman

And I wonder how long youd last if you started hitting on girsl who just came in to buy a pair of jeans.

Imagine how youd feel if you are in japan and you get hit on every 10 minutes by every plain Jane girl who decides they like you while spotting you walking down the street Im sure the girls in London get pretty sick of the attention and wolf whistles.

I read in JT here that many women actually hook with lovers and boyfriends at the gym while they are working out. Exercises is a big thing for many of these women. Join a sports club and then start lifting weights or use the pool.

My advice probably is getting involved in club activities and meet people in the process of doing things, than prowling around gaijin bars looking for a score that is not there.

I generally don't look for girls in bars, I mean, the type of girl who goes to a bar to meet someone isn't exactly gf metarial.
No I didn't wolfwhistle, I just tried to strike up conversation, no harm in trying.
at work it is kind of funny, I get a good repour(sp?) with a lot of customers, it makes my day go quicker. It's actually how I met my current gf .
As for the gym it's a good idea but I'm only going for a month, I guess jogging around a local park might be cool, I don't know.
but i'm tall, slim and have blue eyes with long brown curly hair.

on a side note, why do people mention gaijin bars a lot? I mean, if I go to Japan I want to experience Japanese bars and clubs surely? is there some kind of rule about Japanese clubs?

Originally Posted by kurosawa

I generally don't look for girls in bars, I mean, the type of girl who goes to a bar to meet someone isn't exactly gf metarial.

I don't go to bars to meet gf-material

Originally Posted by Pkl

Though it's worth mentioning that a lot of the guys are quite old, overweight and badly dressed. Or just complete twats.

Manage to avoid those pitfalls (though age is excusable by itself) and you're in with a fighting chance.

To answer the opening question directly:

Exactly the same kind of places where you meet women back home.

aren't you supposed to be ..........PM me.

Originally Posted by kurosawa

I on a side note, why do people mention gaijin bars a lot? I mean, if I go to Japan I want to experience Japanese bars and clubs surely? is there some kind of rule about Japanese clubs?

People go to where they can meet people who can speak the same language and you can order a beer in English. several expat bars are in kyoto and the barmen speak English.

You can go to local bars but dont expect patrons or barmen to speak much English. You will be a an object of curiouslity to locals but dont expect any great English ability. I prefer actually going to local bars than gaijiin haunts and now have a regular I go to. Locals will accept you if you can speak japanese and know how to order a drink. Dont just see them as places to hit on women though as you may be asked to leave if you make a nuisance of yourself.


Most drinks are in 'katakana' and the barman undersstand 'beer' or cocktail names in English.

Find a place whose atmosphere appeals to you, has friendly locals or perhaps live music nights. Many gaijin bars here also have big screen TVs and you can watch major sports events such as NFL, rugby etc.

Originally Posted by kurosawa

on a side note, why do people mention gaijin bars a lot? I mean, if I go to Japan I want to experience Japanese bars and clubs surely? is there some kind of rule about Japanese clubs?

If you go into a bar with a pretty girl standing outside then expect to have your wallet emptied. It will cost you $20 bucks just to sit down and those little aperitifs they put in front of you are $10 bucks each. a bottle of beer will cost you $20 bucks. A girl sits on your knee and you are expected to buy her drinks as well.

Snack bars are in business to fleece unsuspecting customers and are for people on expense accounts.

FD, you are right about those places, but there are also plenty of bars that don't fit that pattern, and who cater to the locals.

Do you often go to those type of places? When I was first in Japan I often did if some oyaji I was teaching was paying for it. Good fun, as long as you aren't paying.

Originally Posted by 金正日

FD, you are right about those places, but there are also plenty of bars that don't fit that pattern, and who cater to the locals.

Do you often go to those type of places? When I was first in Japan I often did if some oyaji I was teaching was paying for it. Good fun, as long as you aren't paying.

Im actually a fan of karaoke rather than drinking a lot and my local has a karaoke machine. Food is not great but I spend a few hours chinwagging with regulars. Im the regular gaijin there as there used to be a horde of NOVA teachers about 2 years ago but they all went home. wall to wall NOVA teachers.

It's actually an izakaya but it only has about 6-7 seats so its small enough that you can actually talk with people. Its not a snack bar but i can get my beer and karaoke, and im happy. Im not into the hostess/mizuwari scene anyway.

[takano IL]

Originally Posted by Mav

How do you meet women in Japan?

by this order;
libraries
shelters
cemeteries
good luck!

[kurosawa]

cool, some interesting info here. so I should advoid them classy looking places with sexy girls outside inviting me? wallet wise I mean. Really I just like places like a dance club or rock and metal club or a local bar. Not really a fan of gaijin bars I think. I mean, I can go to a bar here full of english people, why'd I do that abroad?
reminds me of my mate who said his trip to spain was amazing because the local bar showed Only Fools and Horses.
Then again, it's easy to say it now. Once I've been over there a few days I might be dying to just have a decent conversation.

[Lubes17319]

Originally Posted by Pkl

Though it's worth mentioning that a lot of the guys are quite old, overweight and badly dressed. Or just complete twats.

You just caught me on an off night.

[the_pink_tako_yaki]

For Japanese bars and clubs, Flying Dutchman hit the nail on the head when he said to at least know SOME Japanese (to order a drink at the very least) and not to go there just trying to pick up on girls.

One of the dance clubs I go to, there used to be very few gaijin there, there are more now and each time I go now, I see at least 2 guys try picking up on random girls and pretty much always fail miserably. #1 because it's clear that they don't know anything about the social scene that those girls belong to, and #2 because it's clear that they came just to pick up girls, and when one says "no" they quickly bounce over to the next girl(s) and try to corner her/them....that clears the dancefloor of girls REALLY quickly.
And yeah as he mentioned, if any of the girls complains, you can get kicked out of some places.

As a tip, both genders in Japan tend to respond better to a friendly ice-breaker that doesn't come on too strong...eye contact and a simple "kanpai (cheers)" may be enough. If someone is interested in talking, their reaction will show it. If you're at a japanese-style club, most of the girls won't respond too well if you try to dance too close to them with either an overbearing stance or too much physical contact, particularly if they've never met you before. Starting with small-talk can work alright. If your Japanese doesn't get you very far, just try speaking in slow, clear English; most Japanese will be able to understand some of the basics and if you seem friendly and interesting enough, they may bust out a dictionary on their cell phone and try hard to communicate with you.

The same for socializing can be said for japanese bars, minus the dancing of course. Some bars are very quiet and it can be hard to strike up a conversation with someone else there, but a lot of times, a curious customer will bust out the inevitable "Where are you from?" Bar prices can range a lot and some have seating charges, usually ranging anywhere from 300-1000yen. Snack bars are much more expensive and should be avoided, at least until you understand the system comfortably. I would recommend finding a good tachinomiya...a standing bar with no seats....as those places are usually cheap, lively, and attract a nice variety of locals. Some of those sit-down bars probably attract too many old men for your tastes

[kurosawa]

Originally Posted by the_pink_tako_yaki

For Japanese bars and clubs, Flying Dutchman hit the nail on the head when he said to at least know SOME Japanese (to order a drink at the very least) and not to go there just trying to pick up on girls.

One of the dance clubs I go to, there used to be very few gaijin there, there are more now and each time I go now, I see at least 2 guys try picking up on random girls and pretty much always fail miserably. #1 because it's clear that they don't know anything about the social scene that those girls belong to, and #2 because it's clear that they came just to pick up girls, and when one says "no" they quickly bounce over to the next girl(s) and try to corner her/them....that clears the dancefloor of girls REALLY quickly.
And yeah as he mentioned, if any of the girls complains, you can get kicked out of some places.

As a tip, both genders in Japan tend to respond better to a friendly ice-breaker that doesn't come on too strong...eye contact and a simple "kanpai (cheers)" may be enough. If someone is interested in talking, their reaction will show it. If you're at a japanese-style club, most of the girls won't respond too well if you try to dance too close to them with either an overbearing stance or too much physical contact, particularly if they've never met you before. Starting with small-talk can work alright. If your Japanese doesn't get you very far, just try speaking in slow, clear English; most Japanese will be able to understand some of the basics and if you seem friendly and interesting enough, they may bust out a dictionary on their cell phone and try hard to communicate with you.

The same for socializing can be said for japanese bars, minus the dancing of course. Some bars are very quiet and it can be hard to strike up a conversation with someone else there, but a lot of times, a curious customer will bust out the inevitable "Where are you from?" Bar prices can range a lot and some have seating charges, usually ranging anywhere from 300-1000yen. Snack bars are much more expensive and should be avoided, at least until you understand the system comfortably. I would recommend finding a good tachinomiya...a standing bar with no seats....as those places are usually cheap, lively, and attract a nice variety of locals. Some of those sit-down bars probably attract too many old men for your tastes

haha, a wealth of knowledge there! thanks I'll really take what you say onboard. in alll honestly I'm not going JUST to pick up chicks but if it happens that'd be great. I'm not the type to drunkenly try to talk to girls, it's too unnatural for me.
thanx though the replies here have been surprisingly helpful!

[THEDON]

This is fairly straightforward...

Why not take a few Japanese lessons?

Then once you have mastered the art of the initial greeting and have a couple of questions up your sleeve the girls will more than likely start trying to teach you japanese themselves...women love a trier

I found an exgf in Cambridge by just doing that and during our 1.5 year relationship my friend ended up bedding around 30 of these girls--having them teach him japanese and also getting invited to japanese house parties all over london...

Come on man use your common sense.

[Neo-Rio]

You meet any woman by talking to her.
It's not hard.

What happens after that though is up to you.

[slasher1979]

Originally Posted by Neo-Rio

You meet any woman by talking to her.
It's not hard.

What happens after that though is up to you.

Be nice to them! talk to them in japanese if possible!
SMILE!

[takano IL]

How do you meat women in Japan ?

[PanPanBandito]

Originally Posted by takano IL

How do you meat women in Japan ?

Amigo,

It's Easy.

3-Step Bandito Date Plan

Step One: Find Your Hook.
"The Free English Lesson" method is an old favorite, but I recommend something unique like getting a small dog, such as a Chihuahua.

Step Two: Find Where the Chicas are At.
"Starbucks" is also an old favorite, but be creative.
Try the area near a women's university, or standing around the entrance to The Gap when there is a sale on cardigans.

Step Three: Initiate Contact.
"Talking to the Girl" is a waste of time. Banditos need to be on their feet, and if you want a conversation than call your sister in Mexico City.
Otherwise, just bring the little dog, they will come to you.
Trust me, Amigo, it works.
Hot chicas dig little dogs.
No Japanese Language skills necessary, if they like the dog, and they will, you'll be having to change your bedsheets in no time.


Other than this it's a lot like making Chile Verde. Timing and the ingredients are important, but in the end you're just going to dump your junk all over everything and have it spooned down.

Comprende?

[DickHurtzer]

Like my church pastor always told me......

The three C`s


Cars
Cash
Confidence

Too bad I have none of the above....

[takano IL]

Originally Posted by PanPanBandito

Amigo,

It's Easy.

3-Step Bandito Date Plan

Step One: Find Your Hook.
"The Free English Lesson" method is an old favorite, but I recommend something unique like getting a small dog, such as a Chihuahua.

Step Two: Find Where the Chicas are At.
"Starbucks" is also an old favorite, but be creative.
Try the area near a women's university, or standing around the entrance to The Gap when there is a sale on cardigans.

Step Three: Initiate Contact.
"Talking to the Girl" is a waste of time. Banditos need to be on their feet, and if you want a conversation than call your sister in Mexico City.
Otherwise, just bring the little dog, they will come to you.
Trust me, Amigo, it works.
Hot chicas dig little dogs.
No Japanese Language skills necessary, if they like the dog, and they will, you'll be having to change your bedsheets in no time.


Other than this it's a lot like making Chile Verde. Timing and the ingredients are important, but in the end you're just going to dump your junk all over everything and have it spooned down.

Comprende?

Thank you pan pan
looks like you worked hard on this one, cheers, I’ll maybe read it when I find a way to get over my ‘up-to-3- lines –syndrome’

[PanPanBandito]

Originally Posted by takano IL

Thank you pan pan
looks like you worked hard on this one, cheers, I’ll maybe read it when I find a way to get over my ‘up-to-3- lines –syndrome’

Work?
What work?

That's just common sense amigo, like writing why you like the newscaster with the nalgas grandes on the BBC.

[Showa45]

I like to stand outside of Shinjuku station, south exit, grab them by the shoulder and with an insanely fake deep voice say, "You like me?!?!"

This is tried and true. It might take you a few minutes but sooner or later you'll get what you're looking for.

Just remember, if they say, "kowaii" and laugh then you have broken the ice and it's best to keep following them. If they lead you to a koban then best to jump into a store, cab, crowd, just run and hide.

Remember "no" means "NO" in America, but "no" means "I really really want you to take me somewhere private and forcefully tongue kiss me" in Japan.

Happy hunting....

[takano IL]

Originally Posted by Showa45

I like to stand outside of Shinjuku station, south exit, grab them by the shoulder and with an insanely fake deep voice say, "You like me?!?!"

This is tried and true. It might take you a few minutes but sooner or later you'll get what you're looking for.

Just remember, if they say, "kowaii" and laugh then you have broken the ice and it's best to keep following them. If they lead you to a koban then best to jump into a store, cab, crowd, just run and hide.

Remember "no" means "NO" in America, but "no" means "I really really want you to take me somewhere private and forcefully tongue kiss me" in Japan.

Happy hunting....

Great answer,
No, wait,
Was it for the

How do you meet women in Japan

/
Or for the

How do you meat women in Japan

?

Please clear it up
..

[Chromedome]

If you don't like the girls who hang out in bars or you're sick of having to drink all the time, finding girls online is a hell of a lot cheaper and more efficient. Plenty of nice girls in here. http://friends.japanichiban.com/public/home.jhtml

[ultraa4]

Originally Posted by Mav

I have often heard that it's easy to meet girls in Japan, but how you all go about it? Apparently, a lot of guys use the 'I"ll teach you English if you teach me Japanese' strategy or go to Gaijin bars to meet up with the local Gaijin Hunter population. Is this really the case? How do you go about meeting girls who aren't all about English practice?

1.brush up on japanese. you dont really need that much, but enough to arrange dates, times to talk about where your from, where you live, because often, they'll want to practice their english, but have to be met half way.

2.notice women on train. eye contact. if their is eye contact and smile slightly looking downward, initiate)

3.english lessons. privates. you should know to handle the rest. go slow (theyre always conscious of the "yellow cab" stereotype - and it is a major very childish and idiotic one started by no-nothing foreigners.

4. friend of a friend. Usually, in a party thrown by student from the english center (community one, not the major 3 eikawas) theyre are a few gals looking for just friendship. If they want to initiate more, thats up to your ability.

5. this may or may not work, but its worked for me a couple of times. I left my umbrella at a bench on the kotoden. a girl picked it up and gave it to me and smiled. I did it again (not purposely, I swear) she picked it up again. I saw her and she smiled. we talked (broken english and some broken nihongo) and we went out. wasnt really a date - we just met at McDonald and talked

the same thing happened when I left my hat on the train, and I met a lady. She was beautiful too. Unfortunately, she was married, and flirting a little, but nothing happened. I married my girl I was dating off and on during this period, but thats all I got.

a lot of times, girls think its cute when your just learning japanese and not trying to show off too much. There were plenty of those types, and girls would later tell me, I dont like that guy.

critics, blast away.

[Neo-Rio]

Japanese girls generally like romance, holding hands, kissing, and all of those soppy things.
Honestly, as long as you do this to them, they won't care if you can't speak a word to them.
In fact, it helps if you can't speak any Japanese - let them try out their English.

Japanese girls are shy so you generally need to tell them that you think they are cute, beautiful, kind, thoughtful, etc. and treat them little girls.

When it comes time to go muff diving and they resist - you tell them that you think they will do really well at it, you won't make them do anything that they don't want to do, and if it it sucks, then you can always try again.

[The King]

Originally Posted by Neo-Rio

When it comes time to go muff diving and they resist - you tell them that you think they will do really well at it, you won't make them do anything that they don't want to do, and if it it sucks, then you can always try again.

I like your thinkin'.

But I like it when it sucks.

[Humbert]

I hang around the High Schools, it really is the best way. If the young ones arent interested you change change tactics and target the mum.
Having an enormous _____ helps, too.

[The King]

Originally Posted by Humbert

Having an enormous _____ helps, too.

So ya'll heard of my work?

[Humbert]

Originally Posted by The King

So ya'll heard of my work?

Nope.you heard of mine?

[DickHurtzer]

Originally Posted by Humbert

I hang around the High Schools, it really is the best way. If the young ones arent interested you change change tactics and target the mum.
Having an enormous _____ helps, too.

Too old...I go for the Jonior High schools.....lots of them are still untouched...and my small weenis seems to be appreciated among the younger generation...

[Humbert]

Originally Posted by DickHurtzer

Too old...I go for the Jonior High schools.....lots of them are still untouched...and my small weenis seems to be appreciated among the younger generation...

I usually aim for uncharted territory, if you know what i mean ____.

[The King]

Originally Posted by Humbert

Nope.you heard of mine?

Yeah, but I wasn't able to find it. More of a myth than fact, I reckon. Like that tale of the Nova guy gettin' blown in the classroom. Just some peaches, a tissue, and a positive imagination, more likely.

[Humbert]

Originally Posted by The King

Yeah, but I wasn't able to find it. More of a myth than fact, I reckon. Like that tale of the Nova guy gettin' blown in the classroom. Just some peaches, a tissue, and a positive imagination, more likely.

Well, i posted a pic of the beast on here. Unfortunately that led to the deletion of my account, i am not so keen to post it again.
You could just ask ____ about it.

[The King]

Originally Posted by Humbert

Well, i posted a pic of the beast on here. Unfortunately that led to the deletion of my account, i am not so keen to post it again.

I hear ya brother. We've all had trouble with that. I haven't been allowed back to Tokyo Disneyland since '89.