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  • Approaching Japanese

    What is the best way for a man to approach a woman here and seem natural and not too threatening? How can you get a girl away from her group of friends? Is there some sort of timing involved

  • #2
    Originally posted by lennonix View Post
    What is the best way for a man to approach a woman here and seem natural and not too threatening?
    whats natural about picking up a girl in a bar?

    How can you get a girl away from her group of friends? Is there some sort of timing involved
    why should she choose a complete stranger over her friends? Find a girl with no friends.

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by lennonix View Post
      How can you get a girl away from her group of friends? Is there some sort of timing involved
      Yes, when she is not with her friends. Since you cannot choose when she will be with her friends, when you go up and talk with them (assuming it is not at a bar or dance club), be nice to all of them. When you leave give the one you like your contact information. Giving it to all of them puts you into "friend" category right off the bat. Let her choose the time to contact you instead of trying to drag her away from her friends. Why? Because if you were somehow able to drag her away, all of them are going to either gossip about how and what positions you 2 are getting sweaty, or at least think of it, thereby shaming her in front of her friends.

      If she does somehow ditch her friends, see....


      http://forum.gaijinpot.com/showthrea...is-promiscuous

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by KansaiBen View Post
        whats natural about picking up a girl in a bar?
        That would depend on who you are asking. To you, I'd imagine there is nothing natural about it. To others...

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Effected After View Post
          That would depend on who you are asking. To you, I'd imagine there is nothing natural about it. To others...
          Maybe, I just don't think its natural to go up to strangers in a bar, strike up sappy conversations with them with the intent to get into their pants by the end of the night. Having to come onto an internet forum so you can learn what to say to them is not what I consider natural. How about being yourself?

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by KansaiBen View Post
            Maybe, I just don't think its natural to go up to strangers in a bar, strike up sappy conversations with them with the intent to get into their pants by the end of the night. Having to come onto an internet forum so you can learn what to say to them is not what I consider natural. How about being yourself?
            One-night stands with strangers picked in bars are natural for promiscuous singles, wouldn't you think? I used to love such things, rare as they were ... so much excitement and novelty.

            I do agree with your point on having to come to an internet forum to learn what to say. But even that is sort of OK; we have to start somewhere. LD2 gave some great advice, for example

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by lennonix View Post
              What is the best way for a man to approach a woman here and seem natural and not too threatening? How can you get a girl away from her group of friends? Is there some sort of timing involved
              I don't know where you're from, but I do have a question. Why, in your mind, "approaching Japanese" is different from "approaching people"? In your home country, how would you approach a girl without making her feel threatened? Would you try to get her away from her friends right there?

              Anywhere, the girls would feel your desperation (as in, trying to get her away from her friends) and lack of experience (as in, trying to follow someone's advice), and they'd respond as you'd expect. Anywhere, (most) girls respond positively to confidence, lack of pressure, sense of humor and independence.

              By way of example, I offer the case study of my last same-night victory - with no alcohol involved since she didn't drink.

              I was traveling in a "foreign country" and didn't speak the language. I was alone in a bar, and noticed a group of girls who were also stealing glances at me, apparently. One of them had a birthday, so I signed the book I was reading - a Hemingway - "happy birthday", went over, and presented it to her. They invited me to join their little party.

              Only one of them spoke English, but her English was perfect. She wasn't the birthday girl (who got my English book). For me, she was the most attractive one. Long legs, a lovely swell of breasts, wonderful smile... etc. We naturally chatted together more, since we could communicate. I told her I was about to leave the country, and would have loved to learn more about her and her country. I was actually interested. She didn't mind chatting some more. We agreed to meet in a late-night cafe later on.

              At the end of the evening, spent tet-a-tet at that point, I simply told her that I had no reason to invite her to my room apart from really liking her. But I really would have loved her to come with me, I confessed. The choice was hers. She said no, and we joked about one-night stands for a while, she had a nice dry sense of humor and we laughed a lot. I offered her my coat (it was chilly outside) and escorted her home through the night-time *** city (location isn't important, but there was mortal danger behind each corner, mind you, even back in those days). Mid-way, she understood I was being genuine, possibly considered what she was about to miss, and became thoughtful. I allowed her to think in silence. Finally, she made her decision, we turned around and went to my room. I was rewarded with some unforgettable, attentive sex... ah well, the single days... sigh. I still miss that girl after all the time. But I didn't want to get involved, so never followed up, the fool.

              And there was another time.. nah, never mind.
              Last edited by Gaijin de Moscu; 2012-03-06, 09:06 PM.

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by Gaijin de Moscu View Post
                I don't know where you're from, but I do have a question. Why, in your mind, "approaching Japanese" is different from "approaching people"? In your home country, how would you approach a girl without making her feel threatened? Would you try to get her away from her friends right there?

                Anywhere, the girls would feel your desperation (as in, trying to get her away from her friends) and lack of experience (as in, trying to follow someone's advice), and they'd respond as you'd expect. Anywhere, (most) girls respond positively to confidence, lack of pressure, sense of humor and independence.

                By way of example, I offer the case study of my last same-night victory - with no alcohol involved since she didn't drink. At the end of the evening, spent tet-a-tet of course, I simply told her that I had no reason to invite her to my room apart from really liking her. But I really would have loved her to come with me, I confessed. The choice was hers. She said no, and we joked about one-night stands for a while, she had a nice dry sense of humor and we laughed a lot. I offered her my coat (it was chilly outside) and escorted her home through the night-time *** city (location isn't important, but there was mortal danger behind each corner, mind you, even back in those days). Mid-way, she understood I was being genuine, possibly considered what she was about to miss, and became thoughtful. I allowed her to think in silence. Finally, she made her decision, we turned around and went to my room. I was rewarded with some unforgettable, attentive sex... ah well, the single days... sigh. I still miss that girl after all the time. But I didn't want to get involved, so never followed up, the fool.

                And there was another time.. nah, never mind.
                It reminds me DJ`s posts.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by lennonix View Post
                  What is the best way for a man to approach a woman here and seem natural and not too threatening? How can you get a girl away from her group of friends? Is there some sort of timing involved
                  Why no sir..
                  That doesn't sound creepy, no, not at all.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Next time put some thought in your topics. There is no discussion value other then discussing how hopeless you're.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Kiboo View Post
                      It reminds me DJ`s posts.
                      Who's DJ? Am I in a good company?

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Yet another boring thread....

                        ...by a boring poster.

                        http://forum.gaijinpot.com/showthrea...irgin-in-Japan

                        http://forum.gaijinpot.com/showthrea...n-value-in-men

                        http://forum.gaijinpot.com/showthrea...-I-doing-wrong

                        http://forum.gaijinpot.com/showthrea...-laid-in-Japan

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Luckily it got some entertaining inputs.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by KansaiBen View Post
                            Maybe, I just don't think its natural to go up to strangers in a bar, strike up sappy conversations with them with the intent to get into their pants by the end of the night.
                            Yes, I agree, I know it's not natural for you.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by lennonix View Post
                              What is the best way for a man to approach a woman here and seem natural and not too threatening? How can you get a girl away from her group of friends? Is there some sort of timing involved
                              Lure them away with chocolate, then tie 'em up and whisk them away.

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